Relief, trepidation and the great unknown

Relief - I got my latest TMA results today and achieved 98%, which, considering there was an awful lot of sketching involved, I am very happy with.  The random 2% missed was just for not including more options, I can live with that!

Trepidation - I'm still not entirely convinced that I actually KNOW any of this!!  It's OK learning as you go and completing the assignment, but I'm not sure how much is actually going in at the end of the day.  Which fills me with pre-exam panic before the last assignment has even begun.

The Great Unknown - not so much study related as life-related.  My job (with its associated long commute) has been extended till the end of September now - not bad for what began as a 6 week interlude.  I've also been allowed to stay with my current employer, so there's no longer the fear of going back to a dead-end job in my old place.  There is still a question, however, as to what I will go back to (and indeed whether things may end up being extended further into the winter).  A very big part of me is ready to be back in our office closer to home, with a 30 minute commute instead of 3 hours.  But another part of me, that part that is finally starting to come alive as a management grade, would happily accept any chance for it to continue.  But with that some trepidation with regards to the travel when it involves snow and ice, the days are too long now.

So a few wobbles along the way of the student this week, hoping for an injection of confidence from somewhere soon!!

Survival skills

Having recently been watching a TV programme about a bunch of Englishmen surviving on a remote island, it leads me to think about survival.

Not the machete and 'man-make-fire' type thing though.

More the - I dunno - get through the course and exam and come out the other side relatively unscathed type.

Survival skill 1 - most importantly - have people around you who understand (or at least sympathise) with what you are going through.  If you have an 'other half' who objects to an overflowing washing basket at the time of an assignment, then you are in trouble.  Thankfully my other half is very accepting of my domestic failings, whether they be at the time of assignment or down to general 'life is for living not washing' moments.

Survival skill 2 - remember that it IS voluntary!  Sometimes it's hard to remember this one, especially this far down the line, and it can feel like someone has a gun to my head at times - particularly assignment times.  For most students though, including myself, there is always the option to simply walk away, from the course, from the whole study plan.  If your job and livelihood is not directly dependent upon it, then leaving it all behind is always an option, even if it's the last option I would ever consider in real life!

Survival skill 3 - Good Enough is good enough.  Another one that's easy to say but hard to believe in.  It's hard for a perfectionist not to strive for perfection.  But when the stress ball hits you hard in the head, sometimes it's worth remembering that a passing mark is still a Pass whether it's a 40% pass or a 97% pass. Finishing an assignment or an exam with that in your head can be helpful - especially for exams, where the result is further away than that for a TMA.  It's something that I tend to include in my revision too, I will focus on whichever areas would get me the most confident 40% and work upwards from there.

Survival skill 4 - Anything is still better than nothing - when it comes to studying (and to motivating yourself to study when you don't have to do so to keep your job), remember that every little bit counts.  So even those 30 minutes on the train or bus, or the half hour of reading you crammed in while you had a bath, will achieve more than simply not having done anything.  All the little bits add up - and in fact occasionally, the context will aid with the memory of something - for example, I will remember a particular paragraph of a book by the song that I listened to on my MP3 player at the time whilst on the daily commute.

Survival skill 5 - Plan as if you've already succeeded - you may have noticed by my earlier blog posts, but I have a tendency to plan well ahead.  I dunno if this is technically a survival skill but it appears to work for me anyway.  I don't have a 'what happens if I fail?' plan, I refuse to accept it as an option, I'd simply have to deal with it if it happened.  So far this appears to have worked, and I don't plan to change this way of thinking.

Oh - and if all else fails, procrastinate well and keep the washing basket empty!!

How did I miss that?

Well, having spent much of the evening reading and working on TMA2, I've now hit that period of the night where the 'what nexts' are coming out again.

Having recently spoken to my tutor (who is of French origin) and mentioned that I was considering the beginners French course next, (to be met by a sharp intake of breath and that even she didn't like the look of some of the questions when her hubby took the course), I have been wondering again about the choices for the 'mandatory' course.

And this time I spotted a potential....TM129 - Technologies in practice.  Dealing with 3 diverse bits, Linux, Networking and Robotics, it sounds interesting and practical and...well...maybe easier than Beginner's French in a twisted fashion that possibly only a fellow programmer might understand.

So I dunno...again!!  I know there's plenty of time before I have to make a decision, and the course has both an Oct 2014 or Feb 2015 start option. 

Why do this to myself so far in advance you may well ask?  Well the answer is something akin to positive thinking, if I make decisions now which assume that I have passed the course I am currently working on, then my brain is fooled into believing that I can pass the course and doesn't hit quite such a state of panic and what-if type behaviour.  And the goalposts look that much closer!!  !!Dunno how much truth is actually in that but hey it seems to have worked so far.

I'm in the process of wresting back some level of control on the washing basket...of course....TMA procrastination!!

Exhaustion or procrastination?

I've hit a lull lately, a period where, for whatever reason, I just can't seem to get my head in gear with regards to my studies.

It's not the course - got through the TMA in plenty of time before going away for a weekend break (and had it back with great results - 97%), I'm enjoying the reading that I am cramming in whilst journeying to and from work.  I just seem to be feeling the increasingly desperate need to simply STOP.  Everything.  The studying, the quilting, the stitching, the washing and ironing, everything.  Stop the world, I wanna get off!!

Is it simply procrastination (which does hit from time to time for all students) or have I finally broken my head and hit the point of exhaustion?  Who knows?  And why won't they tell me?

Hoping I can pull myself out of this slump as I really can't afford any lengthy downtime in Level 3 courses.  I think the extra 2 and a half hours travel every day, although it is giving me much needed uninterrupted study time, is seriously taking it out on a body that already felt overtired, overtaxed and overworked!

Adrenalin shot required please - stat!

En Francais, sil vous plait??

The strange machinations of the mind immediately upon submission of the TMA.  What do other students do on that particular night, I wonder?

I would hazard a guess that some people read, re-read and read over again their submission, till they are in a blind panic state!

For me, however, finishing a TMA almost always triggers the 'what next' vibe.  So I find myself perusing the course descriptions for whatever I am fancying next.  Well, as you know, I had decided that 'next' is likely to be the mandatory Level 1 from the prescribed list.  So off I go down the list to see what the options are.  There appear to be an abundance of Business Studies courses (yawn), a couple of maths ones (nope - been there with S151, learned my lesson and won't repeat the experience).  Unfortunately the only IT one is a 60-pointer which, as well as giving me 30 more points than I would need, would also be out of my budget, there's a hefty financial jump between the world of 30 and the world of 60-pointers.

But languages...hmm ..there are lots of language courses.  So my current front-runner is 'L192 - Bon Depart - Beginners' French'.  I did a GCSE at night school about 16 years ago and loved it and came out with decent results, so I think it might be just the course for me.  And as a foreign language, I think it might not let my mind slip entirely back into Level 1 thinking, so that after Graduation Phase 1, I can still think hard enough to get back to those final two Level 3 courses aka The Honours Part (courses yet to be decided as the syllabus is changing so I'm hoping there may be new things out there that take my eye by the time I need to make that decision).

Au revoir mon cheries!!  

Welcome To The New Normal

..or the first attempts at 'New Normal' at least.

The life/work/study week used to work something like this:

• Mon - cram an hour of study in after work and before heading to folk club.
• Tue - cram an hour of study in after Weight Watchers meeting which was after work.
• Wed - night off from study, off to share crafts and lots of nattering with my best friend
• Thur - a decent 2-3 of hours study on the night time after catching up on lost housework in the day
• Fri - a bit like Thursday but maybe not so intense
• Sat - alternating between resisting study and having a day/night off, and mad panic where half the day gets spent at the books
• Sun - a bit like Saturday but only on a night time.

In between this of course there is the cramming in of extras in the bath, and, prior to my last job where I was getting a lift to work, cramming in extras on the bus journey.

The 'New Normal' seems to look a bit like this:

• Mon - read for 2-3 hours on the commute to and from work, collapse on the sofa till folk club time
• Tue - read 2-3 hours on the commute, collapse on the sofa till about bedtime
• Wed - read 2-3 hours on the commute, collapse on the sofa till craft time 
• Thur - a couple of hours during the day, then a mad panic to catch up on lost housework from all the sofa-collapsing earlier in the week
• Fri - just like Thursday but, having caught up a bit, an hour or two in daytime and 2 or 3 on the night
• Sat - much like the 'old' Saturday but with more tiredness
• Sun - same as the old Sunday I guess

(I'm only guessing, of course, that this is the New Normal.  In Reality nothing is ever Normal for long enough to become officially Normality - we only need one missing link in the chain and chaos ensues)

There may actually be more physical time spent studying in the New Normal. I certainly seem to have to pay more attention to structuring the time.  But doing less on an evening just feels wrong so far - It just doesn't feel Normal yet!

Life, the Universe and Everything

If only I knew the answer.

42.

No, not quite!!  Currently wishing that I could reverse the order of the numbers of the hours in the day though and make it 42 instead of 24!!.  (did I tell you about the new job?).

The job comes with a hefty extra commute, and with it a new puzzle.  How to fit in life?

The first couple of weeks of the job have been manic, and we haven't quite found 'the new normal' as I have dubbed it.  I've tried to attempt normality today by doing some study on the bus and train.  The reading part has gone OK, but obviously evaluating websites etc is something I am going to need to do at home, when it's quieter.  So a bit of jiggery-pokery required to Thursdays,Fridays and Saturdays, methinks so that I can get that kind of study in.

Hoping I can assimilate all of this before the TMA is due on the 18th though!

But if you ever find an app that makes for more hours in the day, please let me know!!